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Mirror-Me, or Shadowlight

I'm not exactly what you'd call pretty

but if you get the shadows just right

the light slanted and angled just so

then I might be called "interesting."

I've tried for all my eighteen years

and I think I finally perfected the perfect

formula to create the better side of me:

a lunge to the left, but my knee is bent

and my opposite hip lifted, just a little

with my chest thrust forward (and up)

and my shoulders thrust back, arms out

my neck craned up, my head tilted over

yes, yes- like so

and with my bangs dangling to the side...

as limp as my useless hands, neither of which

have anything to do with the image I'm creating.

My roommate drops something, clattering

her Dior lip-gloss or Burberry perfume beauty

and I lose myself

to the harsh angles and bleak shadows

normal confines and limits of my face

all the bones that aren't structured right

all wrong for that mythical "interesting" me

I can only find in the dim bathroom mirror

and not outside in sun and natural light.